Monday, December 31, 2012

Bid Thee Farewell

Today is New Year's Eve. How quickly time has gone by.

2012.. was my most difficult year by far, a phrase that the people close to me must have heard hundreds of times by now. It felt like the obstacles that challenged me deeply as a person rolled in one after another, threatening to crumble me unless I could use them to grow in character to greater heights.

This year I learnt a bit more about life, and death. I watched friends discover love and begin new stories with their partners. I got to get a glimpse of the life I had always wanted to lead in a secluded village somewhere in Papua New Guinea. I saw how far my dreams could carry me if I had the courage to chase after them. This year, I lived with the most amazing housemates ever and learnt more about friendship, life, God. I experienced how people from different circles of friends can come together to pray and seek God, and end up growing so close with the love of Christ surrounding them. I received new prophecies about the direction God wanted me to grow in, and the amazing future He has for me.

This year, I had to let go of some things that were holding me back from life and choose to keep looking forward expectantly.

This year, I have cried walking home alone and asked no few times why God had forsaken me.
But, this was also the year that I found joy in the little things, laughed without a care in the world, depended on the people around me for strength, felt His peace that could calm a raging storm and learnt faith, so much more faith. This was also the year that I began to truly believe in my dreams, and dream for even bigger things.

So while 2012 was undoubtedly the hardest one yet, it was also the most beautiful one yet.
Because there lies a beauty in brokenness, and an opportunity to be molded into someone tougher, who may be able to show others what life can be like with Jesus by your side, even in the worst of storms.

I am beyond thankful for the year You have given me Papa. :)

So, what lies in store for me next year? I don't know. But, one thing I do know is this, I have asked Him a few years in a row now, how the next year could possibly be better than this one, and every year since, He has not failed to amaze me with the kind of grace and heights He brings to my life.

Next year will be.. new. I will be on placements all year round in Frankston, a place which always felt like it had a bit of magic for me. :) I will have to encounter sick and dying patients every day, and study even harder to keep up. I will be learning to lead even more people in their walks in life, and with God. I will have to say goodbye to people that I have come to love so dearly.

Yet, as I look forward to the new year, I feel a small stirring in my spirit. I hear one word resounding - favour.

And for now, I'm gonna hang on to that, and simply keep believing.

With much love as always,
Dice

Friday, December 28, 2012

Life On A Banana Leaf: My Two Cents

Being home this time has taught me much. As I roam the streets of KL, watch its people live their everyday lives.. I find my heart captured, captivated. I feel God opening new eyes in my soul to see His heart for KL.

I love this place I call home. 

Yesterday, my sister and I followed my mum to the heart of KL to fix some shoes, do cheap shopping and have one of my favourite nasi lemaks. I pondered the way of life most people have there, especially after meeting Pepsi, who was very skilled at fixing shoes. Life for them, was simple. You learn from others, develop a skill set, you work hard and you make a living from that. It was a way of life that eluded me to an extent, a way of life that fascinated me immensely for some reason. It was what drew me to and fascinated me about Koivi too.

And then we met the uncle who sold nasi lemak, who has been selling them even during my childhood. According to my sister, he didn't change a single bit. He is a very cheerful man, and appears very content to live life selling delicious food on the side of a street. Maybe he had other dreams once. Maybe this wasn't the life he intended to live at all. But then again.. maybe he simply made the most out of the cards he had been dealt. All I know is this, encountering his joy next to a busy roadside gave me a glimpse of what 1 Malaysia is truly all about.

Encountering KL itself (in stories for another day) has awakened a new calling within me, one that assures me that I will one day return here to watch change happen right before my eyes and hands, a change for a better future for all Malaysians. I still believe in that future. :)

As with many of my posts, I don't have a point to this. In every case, I write simply because I am compelled to share my convictions. I write simply to think out loud, and hope that maybe, just maybe.. these two cents worth of thoughts may inspire another person to dig deeper and dream even further.

Till next time,
Dice