power

Today was the Gong Xi dinner at Crisis Home that I've been looking forward to for a while now. We had Yee Sang and sparklers and ice cream and yummy food.. ah such a good party! :)

But what blew me away most though, was the praise and worship led by Tim and Sam, something we hardly ever do when we visit Crisis Home. Man, it was SO powerful though, I felt the Holy Spirit stir in me so strongly I felt like I was about to break out in shaking again. It was incredible, and I love that this wasn't a huge camp/conference worship session (as much as I love those), but that it was just a humble one with just a guitar and soft singing, yet I could still feel Him just.. flood that place. Later, Uncle Isaac encouraged us youths to lay hands on a new uncle there, Uncle Yip, who was recovering from meningitis or something like that, and lost his memory after open head surgery and was not completely stable mentally now. And even in those short moments we stood by him and prayed in tongues, I felt an incredible sense of power in that place. It's so hard to describe that feeling, one you definitely have to experience to even imagine.

For so long now, I've been inclined towards believing that my prayers have no power. I cannot bring myself to believe for blind eyes to be opened or diseases to be healed immediately while praying for a person although I do know with all my heart that God can do things like that, and that He has done it over and over and over again. It started off as a seed of thought but grew so subtly that I didn't notice that mindset taking over so much of my thoughts, until today. With my hand laid towards Uncle Yip and my mouth still praying in tongues, I felt God say "You were mistaken all along. It is not that your prayers have no power, it's that they have SO MUCH power. Remember that that power comes from the Holy Spirit too, not yourself. Don't let the devil win by making you think otherwise after a few letdowns and thus cause you to stop praying, no, keep praying those powerful prayers, and keep fighting the enemy." I tried to put down in words what God spoke to me about today as best I can, but really sometimes when God speaks to me, all I get is a feeling, a realization of the truth all along, and to explain that is pretty tough la.

So yea, I am still pretty amazed at how tonight went, not just that part, but also the joy in the fellowship as we played with sparklers, things the uncles haven't touched in 30 over years apparently. :) Oh how I loved it, thank You so much for a beautiful beautiful day God. :)

Hahah and oh, as Uncle Yip was leaving with his parents, he shook my hand and said "cuk lei.. er, cuk meh ah? cuk lei wan to yat ko hao ge lam pang yao la :)", which translates to, I hope you find a good boyfriend. It was really sincere on his part, and yea I laughed it off childishly saying, not yet la, chung mei. But still, as I thought about it after, I felt quite moved by those simple, seemingly irrelevant words. I mean, I'm at a stage of my life where friends are beginning to pair off, and I think you know, of all the expectations I have of a future partner, and I really just wonder if 'he' could even exist. In Uncle Yip's words, I somehow felt encouraged, that he meant it that I shouldn't have to ever settle, that I do in fact deserve a good partner one day in the future. Seemed quite timely too, and yea, just quite moved really. :)

One of my resolutions this year is that I will be brave. If I want to know something I will ask, and if I want to do something but am scared, then I will do it afraid. I was very inspired by Tim today, as he stood in front of grown men, and challenged them to live for more, with powerful, godly words that might have lost its oomph if delivered by a young, less experienced voice. And though his voice was still young in comparison to the uncles there with years more experience, he spoke with an authority that I felt so strongly came from God. I was so blown away I tell you, by his courage to speak the truth, even though people may not listen, even though he might have been afraid. What mattered was simply.. following the heart of God. So that's already three timely and meaningful lessons/inspirations for me today. Praise the Lord. :)


Much blessings and love,
Candice