anyways, yesterday was a good day, and there were some things in yesterday's sermon that had an impact on me. i remember halfways i was feeling all self-concious/doubtful again, the way i always feel every now and then, a feeling i think you might understand too. ever felt you weren't good enough and wonder, if you were loved? haha tad emo i know, but somehow, i was sinking into that again, rejuggling all my flaws. but then the speaker reminded me of the fundamental truth in Christianity, that Jesus loves me more than life. i know the phrase is overused, but to be reminded once again of the truth, that never gets old. and now i am certain that even when i am at my lowest and my worst, that God still loves me the same as He did when i was at my best. :)i am so glad i believe the truth!
"and the people that Jesus attracted were all sinners", like whoaaa.. for that's another truth, that God came for the sinners, the lost, the unloved, the ill, and His outstretched hand is calling us, the sinners, the lost, the unloved, the ill, where some of us have fallen so deep we don't even realize it. and in His arms, there is forgiveness of sins, love, joy, peace. :)
it's gonna be september in 3 days.. maybe before i know it, i will be 17. before i know it, SAM's gonna be over. and before i know it, i will be entering the next chapter of my life, no longer candice the schoolgirl, or candice the college kid, but candice, the med student. gosh life is scary, and so overwhelming in its hugeness. i realized how often i complain about the lack of choices i have, but i realized that what it all boils down to, is that i can in fact choose what i want to do. :) i realize now that if i look back at my posts from long ago, i have said the exact same thing, and i'm still stuck in the same dilemma. guess i can never run from life you know? i think i'm too afraid of making the wrong choices in life, and i don't know how to deal with that but i guess, at the end of the day, what do i have to lose right?
i like this, though it's from a 'nyeh..' movie.
"But now that we’ve grown up, they want a more serious answer. Well, how about this… Who the hell knows? This isn’t a time to make hard and fast decisions. This is the time to make mistakes. Take the wrong train and get stuck somewhere chill. Fall in love - a lot. Major in philosophy because there’s no way to make a career out of that. Change your mind. Then change it again because nothing is permanent. So make as many mistakes as you can. That way, someday, when they ask again what we want to be… We won’t have to guess. We’ll know.”
- angela's graduation speech, eclipse
hahah i also like this! it's from a book i borrowed from kat- titled Then Am I Strong. it's like a classic Christian romance story, but good stuff! :)
*mmmm, i can smell my mum's home cooked food now! yum yum yums!*
"When i see the sunrise there, i'll think, just two hours before it was sunrise back home where my heart is. I love sunrises, but for the next six months they are gonna be especially welcome, because each one means that one more day has come, and I'm that much nearer home."
"That night when things were blackest- when i knew i couldn't go on without cracking up,..... i had reached the lowest spot i'd ever been in. i was sure i couldn't go on another day. Then you came and put your arms around me, and i forgot that you were the one i was supposed to hold up. ... so i let loose of all the pride and determination that had been keeping me going, and i relaxed on your strength. oh honey, it was such a blessed rest."
- Dave to JoAnne, before leaving for Arizona.
mm, good stuff, so sweet! hahah but it was a good book nevertheless, with lots of real problems that forced them to rely on God's strength. so today, i am thankful for trials and uncertainties in my life, for they force me to rely on my faith, and msot importantly, on God. and it feels so... liberating. :)
life is good,
candice :)
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